Lisa Goldfarb

pizza

2009-03-31T14:25:00.002+02:00

I just had lunch with Sara and she had a pizza. Here in Germany, for the most part, when you order a pizza you get your own individual pie. Its unsliced and you eat it with a fork and knife, the pizza slowly becoming a waning moon on your plate. Its eaten in a sit down restaurant and its all very civilized. Yes I can get a greasy square in 2 minutes at Moritzplatz and there are places in NYC where you can eat pizza with silverware but for the most part I'm used to sharing a giant pie between 4 people which has been sliced into triangles that I eat folded with my hands now dripping with grease and onto my lap. I miss the "miss, ya wan extra cheese on dat?" song, the throw away paper plates, cheesy table tops...

grandmas overtaking

2009-03-27T11:14:00.000+01:00

The other day I was riding my bike up a hill rather slowly lost in thought when I became aware of a rider behind me who then passed me. It was a grandma on a bike. Her hair was white, her face wrinkled, her clothes were sporty. She was definately 70 plus, but she was fiesty. She was putting in her all to pass me and I appreciated that because when she slowed down midway up the hill I didn't pass her. This was not the first time and elderly lady got competitive with me and I think its great she's still riding her bike. In fact Ive seen some ladies so wrinkled and frail looking on bikes that I couldn't imagine them standing without a walker. And perhaps they can't! But at least they are still riding. Go ladies! This would never happen in the USA. My grandma was driving a car until she was 90 but a bike? Never.

Birthday

2009-03-26T15:11:00.002+01:00

So today is my birthday. Its cold and raining but I'm inside my cozy studio painting and listening to my favorite program, New Sounds.Check out this episode, its with Guy Buttery. He's amazing! (http://www.wnyc.org/shows/newsounds/episodes/2009/01/24)

But today I have some pangs of guilt. In Germany it is customary on your birthday to bring in sweets to your workplace. You host your birthday party. But alas I did not bring in a cake or cookies to work like I planned. I had over ambitious plans which naturally fell through.

In America your boss throws you a little party.However Im the American (or British) tradition I did receive presents from my boss and students and that was very nice. Thank you!

birthdays

2009-03-25T18:32:00.003+01:00

So tomorrow is my birthday but don't wish me a happy birthday just yet. In Germany its a no noto wish someone a happy birthday before the actual day. And you definately don't have a party before the actual day even if it's convenient. You just might not make it till then! In America, I'd say you can birthday it up from up to a week before the actual event. I mean if I die on my birthday, in America at least I could have enjoyed a big party the weekend before!

doctor visit

2009-03-18T15:16:00.004+01:00

Today I went to the doctors for a check up. I walk into the waiting room and I am greeted by all the waiting patients. I am startled by all the gruß gotts I am getting. I look down at the floor and say gruß gott softly, I don't think anyone heard me but who was I supposed to direct my greeting to anyway? A woman leaves and the chorus sings, "Aufwiedersehen!" I say Aufwiedersehen uncomfortably to myself, no one can hear me. These are the only words said in the waiting room. An introduction and a conclusion but no body. Whats the point? In NYC you just don't acknowledge anyone and if you do say hello usually a conversation follows.

answering the phone

2009-03-16T23:17:00.002+01:00

So when I answer the phone I say hello. This really irks Germans...even when they call me on my cell phone. Like, who else is going to answer my cell phone? In America when the phone rings and you pick it up, you just say,"hello". I'm not going to identify myself unless I'm at work because what if a telemarketer calls? A stalker or one of my ex boyfriends? I want them to identify themselves first so then I can decide if I want to say, "yes this is she" or "no she's not home right now" or "sorry you have the wrong number!" In Germany picking up the phone and saying,"Lisa Goldfarb" just doesnt give me this option.

snow

2009-03-13T17:12:00.004+01:00

Perhaps its just my perception but in New York and Pennsylvania, when it snows the weatherman keeps track of how many inches has fallen. We get excited when we learn that yet another inch has fallen during the hour. Its in the newspaper. "5 inches of snow has fallen in Allentown PA today!!"
"Wow can you believe it? says the weatherman, The last time 5 inches has fallen on this day was in 2006! Wow so long ago! I wonder how many inches of snow will fall this entire winter. I guess we'll just have to wait and see!"
Here in Bavaria it seems no one cares. Its snowing all day and I ask my boyfriend how much it snowed and he just shrugs his shoulders. He doesn't even care! I want to know! I don't know if its because my German is so bad that I cant find how many centimeters of snow has fallen in the newspaper or internet or that I don't have a t.v. but I feel like no one seems to care. Next time I'm getting out my measuring stick and sticking it in the snow. I'll find out myself!

clothes shopping

2009-03-12T22:44:00.004+01:00

I wanted to buy a pair of jeans in Augsburg so I went to Yeans Halle. I tried on a pair and asked the sales clerk what she thought. I thought they looked good and was just looking for false confirmation. To my surprise she said, "hmmm nicht so gut. Ich finde Sie andere." Well she said something like that but in better German. And off she went to look for a better fitting pair. At first I was horrified by the negative feedback but then appreciative that she cared as much as my best friend to tell me the truth and actually look for a solution. She didn't find a better pair in the end but I was happy to know I didn't walk off with a 70 euro ill fitting pair of levis. In America this would never happen. The sales clerk would tell me I look great, I would feel happy and walk off with an ill fitting pair that my best friend would later make me return.

art show

2009-03-12T16:21:00.002+01:00

Tomorrow I have an art exhibit in Glonn, a small village between Munich and Rosenheim. Its at 7:30pm and the details are on my website www.lisagoldfarb.com. If you just happen to be in the area drop by!
So since its my show I will be expected to give a speech about my work. Ill also be expected to show up promptly at 7:30pm. These are 2 things that don't happen when you have an art show in the US. In the US you are undercover as the artist. Only people "in the know" know who you are. You will probably show up late or not at all. You are the mysterious artist. I must say its a lot easier being the mysterious undercover artist. Tomorrow not only is my work on display but so am I. I have to appear confident, be punctual and prepare something to say in GERMAN...that makes sense, like use German grammar correctly akkk!

Sunday

2009-03-08T14:11:00.002+01:00

Today is Sunday and everything in Germany is closed. I just can't get used to that. In New York, that when I did all my shopping. I cant even go food shopping. Stores even close down in the middle of Saturday. My copy shop closed down yesterday at 12:30. Damn it! I miss food shopping at 2am. I dont like this Sunday day of rest imposed on me, Im just bored! In New York I lived in an Orthodox Jewish neighborhood and everything was closed from mid Friday to Saturday night and that was annoying. But at least all I had to do was go to some goy neighborhood and get whatever I needed.

sun

2009-02-28T16:51:00.004+01:00

Today it is sunny in Augsburg and everyone is outside sitting in cafes. This would never happen in NYC at this temperature of 10°C or 48°F. OK that's not that cold but it does happen at colder temperatures on the rare sunny day in winter. Cafes even give you blankets. Today hordes of people were even eating ice cream. I'm just not prepared yet to eat ice cream when I'm still wearing gloves.

rain

2009-02-28T16:45:00.002+01:00

Its rained and snowed the past couple weeks here in Augsburg, yet in town amidst the white was a sea of colors. Blue, green, yellow striped umbrellas...Colorful rainbow umbrellas , the kind only weirdos in NYC use to stand out amid the sea of black umbrellas.

birds

2009-02-28T16:33:00.002+01:00

It took me about 2 years of living here in Germany before I realized what these bird stickers everywhere were for. I thought it was an art exhibit or some sort of street art. But no, its just for the birds and perhaps people too who are prone to walking into windows. They don't do this in NYC but how cool would that be to have bird stickers on every window of every skyscraper in town..maybe in psychedelic colors...

The shaking of hands

2008-10-15T19:18:00.003+02:00

One of the first questions I like to ask my business English students is, whose hand do you shake first? They always reply, the woman's. This, my German readers, will get you in trouble. My parents came to Germany to visit me and meet my boyfriends parents. My father stuck out his hand to greet his father and in return his father refused my fathers hand and went to greet my mother. My father was totally offended until I explained to him this custom of greeting ladies first. It is considered a major offense with Americans to refuse someones hand in a greeting. There is no greeting hierarchy, its first come first serve

Mickey D

2008-09-22T15:58:00.002+02:00

So I set foot in a McDonald's for the first time since I've been here in Germany. Im generally opposed to fast food, but it was still morning and I had a hash brown craving.
The menu in McDonalds here is different than the menu in the US. For one, it omits certain foods of interests...like hash browns! I tried to explain (in Germlish) to the girl, in this surprisingly clean establishment, that hash browns were like Kartoffel pancakes. She had no idea what I was talking about. Saddened about the news I ordered bacon eggs and coffee. I paid and she said if I would sit down she would serve it to me when it was ready. I was a bit confused by that, 1. because I thought all food at McDonalds are hot and ready to eat immediately and 2. that I would be actually served in McDonalds. Anyway it was a nice experience and I didnt even get a stomach ache afterwards. Amazing.

fashion

2008-09-20T13:58:00.002+02:00

It took me awhile to realize why everyone was walking around with their right pants leg rolled up. Is this a new fashion trend? Is half of Augburg part of a gang? Nope. The pant leg is rolled up to avoid getting caught in the gear wheel of the bike. My gear wheel has a covering on it so I was never inducted into the club. This fashion tend has yet to take off in America where most people go by car.

wildlife in Germany

2008-09-16T08:58:00.007+02:00

You know the thing that is disappointing or a challenge depending on your perspective is that there aren't as many animals to see when hiking around as in America. I went on a hike with my Dad and Jurij in Pennsylvania a couple weeks ago and the trail was crawling with baby toads. Sooo cute. Like you would see 3 over there and 5 to your left. They must have just hatched. I saw a Garter snake slither by and we saw a white-tailed deer and without looking very hard.

Now I haven't been going out searching for animals, or turning over many rocks like my brother does, but just walking around Augsburg seems to have an abundance of crows, slugs and a couple of jack rabbits here and there.
I rescued a hedgehog from being roadkill one night a couple years ago but rarely do I see a squirrel.
I saved a few mating toads from being roadkill with official toad rescuers outside of Salzburg on a late Summer evening
One day this spring I saw a couple of European Jays outside my window, but never to be seen again.
This summer I actually caught a lizard while bike riding in the Alps which was very exciting. Matt and I saw the poisonous Black Adder near KuSee. And last weekend I found an Alpine salamander on a rainy hike in the Allgaü which was also very exciting.

a bruise or a beard

2008-09-15T14:48:00.007+02:00

So while I was in PA visiting my folks I went on a bike ride with my Dad. I was testing out my Moms mountain bike when after only 8 miles I stopped short and flew over my handlebars. My only injury was a small cut on my chin. It didnt hurt so much but it was a real bleeder and the sight of my own blood makes me pass out so we had to wait awhile before I was back on my feet. Luckily a man in a red pick up truck with a confederate sign on the front of his truck that said redneck loaded us into his truck bikes and all and took us home. He was patient, didnt say much and didnt smile. He was our unfriendly good Samaritan.

For one week I had a small cut on my chin, no big deal. But then on our way to the Alps for a nice hiking weekend, I bumped ever so slightly my chin on my bookbag. Bam! Extreme pain and a big blue bruise to follow. We hiked to the top of the mountain and had lunch at a mountain lodge. There I was made fun of by a picnic table full of drunk Germans. They said I looked like I had a beard. In fact they were so drunk that I think they did think I actually had a beard.

People were really staring at me and some asked questions. I began to empathize with cirus freaks. In America, you dont stare or at least youre not obvious about it. And I think this is where American and German differ. My German friends and collegues immediately asked me what happened and were giggly about it. My American friends didnt say anything but waited for me to volunteer the information.
Luckily after 2 long weeks the drama is over and Im back to looking just peachy instead of having a blue moon.

america visit: restaurant differences

2008-08-24T21:09:00.005+02:00

I'm visiting the land of the free for a few weeks and I'm really enjoying the free ice water I get as soon as I sit down at a restaurant not to mention the butter that comes with the bread!

I really find it annoying that I have to pay for bottled water in Europe. I have gotten free tap water at restaurants in Europe but they make you uncomfortable for doing so. And I must admit the bread in Germany is tasty enough to eat with out butter and I'm saving a few calories in the process!

coffee talk

2008-08-03T23:01:00.006+02:00

The other day I went to Powwow, a local coffee house, with a friend. It was pretty warm out so I thought a cold drink would be a little more refreshing than the hot coffee which I would normally get. So I ordered an ice coffee. I said, Grüss Gott. Ich hätte gerne einen ice coffee. ( I would like an ice coffee. She said, "ok" and I paid. Then I waited longer than I thought for an ice coffee. And I wondered why the guy in the back was making some sort of ice cream sundae and not my simple ice coffee. Shouldn't my drink come first since I just paid?

In the next minute the guy turned around, smiled at me, said "ice coffee?" and handed the bewildered me the ice cream sundae.

Ok so it wasnt an ice cream sundae. It was a glass of hot coffee with a scoop of vanilla ice cream and whipped cream on top. What I actually ordered was an Eiskaffee. "Eis" sounds exactly like the English word "ice". Eis means ice cream. It is one of the rare German words that actually has less letters than the English counterpart.

If you want an ice coffee, that is a cold coffee with ice cubes in it, go to Powwow and ask for an Iced Kaffee and really pronounce the d. However when I tried asking for an Iced Kaffee in several other coffee houses in the area, they had no idea what I meant...so I suffered not to badly with an icecream coffee. Damn they are really good!

German names

2008-06-18T10:47:00.006+02:00

Its nice to be in a country where the meaning of my last name is appreciated. Germans sometimes ask me if "Goldfarb" is my real name or just an artists name. Its a Jewish name. Its my real name. "Goldfarb" means gold color or gold paint in German. Its an appropriate name for an artist but Americans just don't get it!

names of Americans I know with German last names:
Reisner (traveler)
Weider (pasture)
Adler (eagle)
Bergstein (mountain stone)
Bernstein (amber)
Kessel (kettle)
Gipfel (summit)
Rosenthal (rose valley)
Kaufman (merchant)
Strom (electricity)
Ahorn (maple)
Bauer (farmer)
Klein (little)
Traub (grape)
Ferkel (piglet)
Fuchs (fox)
Hersch (deer)
Weiner (person from Vienna)
Herzog (duke)
Shenker (donor, giver)
Katz (cat)
Reiniger (cleaner)
Saltzberg (salt mountain)
Henkel (handle)
Greenblat (greenleaf)
Steigbegel (Steigbügel-stirrup)
Eichenwald (oak forest)
Zimmerman (carpenter)
Maybaum (Maibaum-Maypole)

Famous People
composers
Johann Sebastian Bach (creek)
George Frideric Handel (business)
Richard Strauss (bouquet, ostrich)
Arnold Schoenberg (beautiful mountain)
Alban Berg (mountain)
Carl Maria von Weber (weaver)
Franz Schubert (Schuber-slip case)
Gustav Mahler (mahlen- to mill)

entertainment
Marlene Dietrich (pick lock, skeleton key)
Kirsten Dunst ( smoke, haze)
Goldie Hawn (Hahn-rooster)
Rob Schneider (tailor)
Fran Drescher (thresher)
Howie Mandel (almond)
John Ritter (knight)
Ted Koppel (belt, padlock)
Jerry Siegel (seal)
Claudia Schiffer (sailor)
Mick Jagger (Jäger-hunter)
Max Weinberg (vineyard)

philosphers
Sigmund Freud (joy)
Carl Jung (young)
Erich Fromm (pious)

artists/writers
H.R. Giger (Geiger-violinist)
Anselm Kiefer (jaw)
Gehard Richter (judge)
Julian Schnabel (beak)
Paul Auster (oyster)
Hermann Hesse (a state in Germany)
Calvin Klein (little)

activists
Helen Keller (basement)
Betty Friedan (Frieden-peace)

companies
Bayer asprin-(Bavarian)
reebock sneakers (Rehbock-roe buck (deer))
The Strand Bookstore (beach)

If you can think of some more names lemme know!

Thailand day 13-Phuket-Bangkok-Augsburg

2008-04-28T11:30:00.004+02:00

April 4th.
Breakfast by the ocean, a frolic with Jurij in the waves and a plane back to Bangkok. We spent the night in the luxurious Bangkok airport hotel and left for Munich early the next morning. Its hard to come back from Paradise. Sigh.

Thailand day 12-Phuket

2008-04-28T11:17:00.004+02:00

April 3rd.
I actually awakened in time for the 7am dive. Its good to be up early for a change! I saw a sea turtle and got so close to it that I massaged its flipper. It was so sweet faced and totally unafraid or just oblivious. I also saw a sting ray, the very poisonous but beautiful lion fish and this crazy techno colored, florescent purple and green giant slug called a Spanish dancer. Jurij didn't dive today because he was a little congested and couldnt equalize. It sucked.

Around 2pm we left the boat and took a speedboat to a van to Kaolak, a town in Phuket. We met up with Annette and Alex, collegues of Jurij who were at the wedding, at their resort in Kaolak. The resort was situated by the beach and built into the jungle. It was very beautiful and a nice way to end our stay. We all walked into town and had dinner. I caught a frog and made many unsuccessful attempts to catch the geckos hanging on the sides of buildings.

Thailand day 11-Phuket

2008-04-28T11:05:00.003+02:00

April 2nd.
I made 2 dives today. New mask, I can see fish! The water is crystal clear and even 27 meters down doesn't feel so deep. I feel more confident in the water and its great to be on the boat. The rocking is relaxing, the boat-made Thai food is excellent and the company is great. I saw box fish, parrot fish, trumpet fish, a school of bat fish, a moray eel, a giant sea cucumber and shit load of other colorful and interestingly shaped fish.
At night we snoozed up on the sun deck hoping to stay there all night under the starry sky where the air was better than our mildewy cabin, but the thunder and lightning and threat of rain forced us back inside.

Thailand day 10-Phuket

2008-04-28T10:38:00.005+02:00

April 1st. April fools day. Haha I get my period and my chest is congested. This is perfect for scuba diving. We were picked up at Lucky Guest House at 6am and were driven to a speed boat an hour away. The next hour and a half were spent on a extremely bumpy speed boat. It was kinda fun, like a roller coaster. Jurij was not as amused. Our dive boat was nice. It had a sun deck above and shaded deck below where we ate and a TV room. The next level below was where we got our gear on and jumped into the water. Cabins were on this level and the level below, the bottom level where we slept. The cabin couldn't be any smaller and was a little mildewy. I even spied a stow away cock roach. The bathrooms were the same as Lucky Guest House and perpetually wet. Jurij and I joked that each place we stayed on this trip got a little worse. I missed the first couple dives because I wasn't feeling so hot but I was reassured that a shark wouldn't attack me since I was bleeding. Instead I went snorkeling with my new pal Naomi. Naomi is from Toronto but has been living with her New Zealander boyfriend in NZ. She wasn't diving because of asthma. And you're not supposed to dive if you have any lung problems. It was interesting to note that after talking with many of the divers, there was a lot of asthmatics on board. Everyone else, especially the dive masters, smoked!
We saw a lot of beautiful fish and wound up being swarmed by a school of barracuda which was a little freaky but cool.
I finally got up the nerve to go diving, I was fine but I was using a crappy mask that totally fogged over and I could barely see anything except though one clear point. I thought this is probably how Momom who has macular degeneration sees.

Thailand day 9-Phuket

2008-04-28T10:05:00.004+02:00

March 31st. We flew to Phuket which is in the south of Thailand. Its actually a large island that juts into the Andaman Sea. Jurij was in a bad mood because he left his jacket in the airport. Our new accommodation at the Lucky Guest House didn't help his mood either. We stayed in a bungalow, a very small and sparse room a minute walk away from the main house. The bathroom was interesting. Basically it was a shower and sink with a toilet in the middle of it. You could shit, shave and wash all at the same time.

We spent the afternoon walking around the tourist trap that is Phuket. Jurij bought a new sweatshirt at a price that almost made the shopkeeper cry. Jurij haggled the guy down to a price probably reserved for Thai people and not tourists. After Jurij bought it the shop keeper tried to make him feel guilty. He wanted to sell it for 30 euros. Jurij gave him 4. (200 baht).

Because we planned to go scuba diving off a boat for the next few days and hadn't dived in 2 years, we took a little refresher course around 3 today. We put on our gear at the beach which I was fumbling with since it had been so long and we swam out into deeper water. I didn't fill may jacket with enough air and was falling behind in the swim. When we reached our destination and descended the visibility was like 2 inches. This made me really nervous and I came back to the surface with the instructor. Then we lost Jurij and this other guy who was taking the refresher also. Because the current was so strong they kept moving even though they thought they were staying in one spot. This did not help my feelings of malaise. Eventually I saw their bubbles, the instructor found them and we swam back.

Thailand day 8-Bangkok

2008-04-18T17:36:00.003+02:00

Today we went to the giant Chatuchak weekend market. It was really hot, I was wearing sticky jeans and feeling a bit sick. Still I could have spent the entire day shopping for trinkets and doodads, fabrics and clothes and a million other things for 1/3 the price of anything I could purchase in Germany. Jurij wasn't unfortunately as interested in shopping the entire day as I was, go figure, so we left after a couple hours and found our way somehow to the Jim Thompson House. Jim Thompson (1906-1967) was an American expat in Thailand who founded the Thai Silk Company. He was originally trained as an architect and designed his own Thai house complete with a very cool art and antique collection. He mysteriously disappeared in 1967. We got the tour and then ate in the adjoining air conditioned restaurant.

Or next stop was the Joe Louis Puppet Theatre. We saw a traditional puppet show about the story of Ganesh, a Hindu God (as I like to call him, the elephant dude). No sooner did we take our seats we had to rise to the national anthem and watch a short video showing the king in various activities throughout his life. They take their royalty very seriously and it is offensive to show any disrespect towards them.

3 puppeteers in black moved around each puppet on the stage. Subtitles or should I say a synopsis of each scene were on a screen to the left and right of the stage. I'm sure I missed a lot of subtlety not knowing Thai. But basically the story goes like this according to the subtitles. The demons are invading heaven so the main god decides that Shiva and Uma should fall in love. Of course thats what I would do if the demons were invading my heaven. Shiva gets hit by a love arrow thrown by the love gor and the 2 fall in love and get married. Sound familiar? Shiva tells Uma after some time at the residence that he wants to spend some time alone meditating. She stays alone at the residence with his friend. Great idea. While he is away his friend tells Uma that she should have a son to protect them. Why cant he protect them? So she naturally created a divine boy from the dirt on her body. The boy is told to fight anyone who approaches the residence. One day Shiva comes home with a friend and sees the boy not knowing who he is. He has his friend fight him but the boy wins. Angrily Shiva throws a trident at the boy and it chops off his head. A moment too late Uma comes out of the residence and discovers the scene. After Shiva learns who the boy is they search all over for his head but it is nowhere to be found. So they decide that the first head they come upon they will take. This happens to be an elephant. Ganesh now has a new head and after all that trouble is sent to fight the demons. Ganesh fights the demons, wins and becomes a mighty god. The end.

Thailand day 7-Bangkok wedding

2008-04-15T13:12:00.003+02:00

March 29
Jan and Armin's wedding.

Jan is from Bangkok. Armin is from Bavaria. They met in Dubai while working as flight attendants for Emirates about 5 or so years ago. They now live in Augsburg. I met Jan here in Augsburg at a German Stammtisch run by my friend Silke (who I had met some months before at an English Stammtisch!) Not long after talking Jan and I discovered that our "significant others" are colleagues in the hospital. Jurij knew more people at the wedding than I did! And because of my extreme form of hypochondria I was happy to be surrounded by a gaggle of MD's in a foreign land.

I used to do wedding photography in NYC but never have I experienced a wedding that started at 8:30 in the morning! Apparently Thais are morning people. The morning ritual is this: The groom and his parents followed by a procession of relatives and friends try to pass through a series of string "barriers" each held up by 2 of the brides relatives. At each barrier light hearted negotiations take place until an agreement is reached and the grooms family is allowed to pass.

The party then proceeded into another room. We took our seats and then watched what seemed like a TV talk show. Both parents were seated on couches opposite each other in the front of the room while the talk show host sat on the couch in the middle holding a microphone. All the parents took turns talking interrupted only by Jan's fathers cell phone beeping in the middle of it. On the stage he took the call. It was pretty funny. Must of been really important! The bride and groom then lit candles to the left of the couches and bowed. Rings were exchanged in the middle of the room, words were exchanged with the parents, pictures were taken.

In the next scene bride and groom are stage center and receive flower necklaces. Then a loop of white string is placed on his head which is connected to a loop of string placed on her head. I think its like kinda symbolic or something. The audience gets up and in single file gets to pour with a ladle water onto the folded hands of the bride and groom and give good wishes. Scene ends and we eat a little something.

Intermission lasts the entire afternoon and we take a trip with Alex and Annette, who work with Jurij, Armin's brother and his parents to the one of the floating markets of Bangkok. Basically we walk onto a covered pier which is lined with Thai style row boats on either side. In each boat is a cook and her "kitchen". We order various tasty dishes and sit Indian style with our shoes off at very low tables on the pier. It was very enjoyable! Yum I loved the huge prawns!

back at the hotel was a dinner for way more people who showed up at the earlier festivities. The dinner was delish but the most memorable thing were the drinks. For one if you ordered your choice of coke, water or whiskey (whisky flavored water was what it really was) as soon as you were finished another of the same would appear 5 seconds later. Didn't matter if now wanted a coke you were going to get another whisky flavored water that you have been unfortunately drinking for the past hour.

Alex asked the waiter if he could order any wine. The waiter responded, sorry sir we only have one bottle of wine and that is reserved for the guest of honour! Jan's father is a well known crooner and the guest of honour was a famous singer, I assume a friend of his, who entertained us that night. But only 1 bottle of wine??? And no big drunken dance party afterwards??? Well I guess that's how they do it in Thailand!

Thailand day 6-Bangkok

2008-04-14T15:52:00.003+02:00

March 28
Happy Birthday Mommy!

and that of the king. Really the Today we visited the National Museum. I got this confused with the National Gallery, a museum of Thai art, past and present which I really wanted to see but didn't. Instead at the NM we read about the detailed history of Thailand of which I do not remember, saw some cool Thai instruments and a whole lotta Buddhas. Buddhas crafted from wood, from metal from stone, small Buddhas, medium sized Buddhas, extremely large Buddhas, Buddhas with various sized ears. I visited about 10 rooms filled only with Buddhas. Although I acknowledge these statues represented years of craftsmanship and art created by the top artists from their day over the course of many many centuries, I took the 10 minute tour. 2 images you cant escape in Thailand are Buddha. Really I think repetition kills the meaning. Isn't that what Warhol was getting at? I definitely got Buddha-ed out. I sure was ready for some good ol pics and statues of Jesus, Mary and various saints by the time I got back to Germany.

Afterwards we roamed around Bangkok. Luckily I had one of the worlds preimere navigators by my side, Sir Jurij Pitako and we always arrived when and where we should have. I have a more go with the flow, see what happens and where I'll wind up approach to tackling a new city. I was able to convince myself that we were wandering the city my way by basically not paying attention to where we were going or reading anything in a detailed manner. Hence we wound up at the National Museum because thats where I told Jurij I wanted to go. Heck it was still a nice place.

So our next stop was the Reclining Budhha who measures 46 meters long and 15 m high. We were looking for the entrance to the very large 20 acre walled temple grounds in the middle of the city. We came upon one entrance that was "for Thai people only". Talk about discrimination!!!! Im going to sue! We got out out map and in a blink a very friendly man camje up to us and asked us. "Where you want to go? Where you from?" Jurij looking very annoyed said we were looking for the entrance for the Reclining Buddha. The man continued, Reclining Buddha closed. It closes at 4pm. I can take you to another temple. Jurij shots back, "but look here in my book it says its open till 5pm!" The man says, Its a Buddhist holiday. C'mon I take you to another more beautiful temple. Jurij suppressing the desire to beat this man to a pulp grabs my hand and instead we practically run through the man, turn a corner and find the entrance to the Reclining Buddha.

Its one thing to read warnings in every guide book about these scams and another thing to experience the scripted scam lines from the guide books come to life. You really want to believe that this friendly nice faced person is wanting to help you. Its a westerners instinct and thats what they try to exploit. Its very jarring. I wondered what would have happened if we got suckered into going with the man. I imagined winding up in some dark alleyway with a bunch of short smiling Thai men trying to sell us fake gems. They laugh unaware of the wrath of the Jurij bunny soon to be unleashed upon them. Howard Cosell's disembodied voice comments, "Its all over for the Thai gem scammers!"

Thailand day 5- Chaing Mai to Bangkok

2008-04-14T14:34:00.003+02:00

March 27
Early flight to Bangkok. Arrived late morning at the Convention Hotel a half hour taxi ride from the center of Bangkok. This hotel was really big, stately, mainly catering to business people. Not chick or gemütlich or as friendly as our last hotel but the breakfast was good. We stayed here because this is where the wedding took place and we didn't feel like schlepping from hotel to hotel for the 4 days we were in Bangkok.

Our hotel room was number 1116. I think this must have been a sign because our last hotel room was number 911. If you turn 1116 upside down, what do you get? That's right 9111. Its a sign. I don't know what kind of sign or if it has any lasting significance but its a sign!

After sleeping all afternoon (Jurij was still a little sick and my nose was now running!) we took a taxi- which here in Thailand are Toyota Corollas! Yes they know a good car, just like my ol TC back home except with a steering wheel on the opposite side- to the Sky Train (sounds really exciting and the guide books say not to miss a ride on one but its just the elevated part of the subway system. Not that it would make any sense given the large population in Bangkok but I imagined some sort of gondola ride above the city like at some zoos or amusement parks. I was a little disappointed....but then amazed that the subway/sky train was so clean and air conditioned. There were flat screened tvs showing advertisements in the train and a soothing automated voice in Thai and in English announcing each station. It was 100 degrees outside we were smooshed together like a bowl of Thai noodles and yet no one smelled and all were quiet.

I am constantly amazed how every other city in the world has a more modern and clean subway system that in NYC. Why is that? Thailand is a 3rd world country for god's sakes!

We walked around Siam square, a shoppers paradise, our nightmare. Basically in Siam square you are either walking around a large block of shopping mall that connects to another large shopping mall block via a skinny enclosed walkway and you cant find your way out or you have found your way out and are now standing in the middle of a hot smoky congested highway wanting to get back in.

Amazingly we found our way to the neighborhood of Bangalapoo. You could say that its an artsy hip neighborhood or you could say its a place were burned out western hippies congregate and old white men walk hand in hand with very young Thai girls. They did have a cool market but Jurij wasn't about to be dragged around shopping for very long on an empty stomach.

We had dinner in a hole in the wall family run restaurant. The kitchen was outside the restaurant on a wagon! But we ate very well for very cheap. In Thailand the more expensive your food is and the nicer the restaurant, the lower in quality your food will be. There is no gormet food here. What the common person eats is what the king eats. If your food is expensive you're only being ripped off.

Thailand day 4- Chaing Mai

2008-04-14T13:31:00.005+02:00

March 26. Today I am 34. How did I get so old? What am I doing with my life? Oh yeah, I'm traveling in Thailand. Not bad.
Jurij was feeling a little better today so we took a trip to a snake farm. We saw lots of animals in small cages including a very exotic bird, the crow. We watched snake charmers play with cobras while a Thai man speaking English into microphone commented in a Howard Cosell inflected voice. I thought I had been transported into a Woody Allen film.
After we visited the famous wa cha lacka yakka ya KA temple (intonation goes up on last syllable) on the highest mountain in Chang Mai built in the 1300's. (Actually Wat Phrathat Doi Suthep one of the most sacred temples in Thailand) I entered a room in the temple walking on my knees and encountered a 180 year old monk sitting in the corner. He asked me where I was from and then wished me good fortune while tying a white string around my right arm. I asked him what the white string meant but he only nodded his head. I found out later that this was holy string. I'm never going to take it off!

When we arrived back in our hotel room I first saw that on the desk there was a beautiful chocolate cake that said Happy Birthday Lisa on it. I looked at Jurij astounded. I said Jurij! How did you do that? I cant believe you got this beautiful cake for me. Thats not your style! Then he looked at me and said, Lisa now how did that happen. What did you do when you first checked in? Yes you gave them your name, address, credit card and birthday.
Im my opinion he should have lied and taken the credit! Men!

Well we had a nice dinner later on at a restaurant whose walls were covered in clocks. 34...hmmm...is my clock ticking?

Later in bed I finished my book, Watership Down. I opened the drawer next to my bed hoping to find the I Ching or some book on Buddhist teachings and principles...but no. Gideons International Association strikes again so I fell asleep while reading revelations. Not the thing to read if you want to have sweet dreams.

Thailand day 3- Chaing Mai

2008-03-30T06:59:00.004+02:00

March 25.
I'm behind in this blog because of spotty Internet access. We were unable to go on our 3 day bike tour because Jurij was suffering in bed. Luckily they postponed the trip one day and let me go for a day trip. There was only one other person on the trip. A Danish gal named Kathrine. She was 37, cute, an engineer for an oil company and traveling by herself. She was strong on her bike and confident on the crazy one track and mountain bike trails ( I was not). I was even thrown off my bike once by a mean little pebble, luckily no major damage.

Before our ride we were taken to an elephant farm where we watched the elephants bath in the river and then perform some circus tricks. I felt a little embarrassed for these majestic creatures. But consoled myself with the fact that these elephant camps generate money from tourism to protect them. Elephants are endangered in Thailand with only 5000 left in the wild. There were also thousands of domesticated elephants that used to work for the timber industry. When lumbering was outlawed in 1989, these elephants were "unemployed" and homeless.
The elephant is the symbol of Thailand and after the show everywhere I looked, at the leaves on the trees, clouds in the sky, foods that I ate, I saw the shape of an elephant.

Before we left the elephant farm I caught a lizard. Yes I thought I am my brothers sister and was very proud. And then I saw the shape of an elephant on the lizards back...

Afterwards we visited a cave. It was well lit and contained your average limestone stalactites and stalagmites. The stalactites hang from the ceiling and the stalagmites grow up from the ground. This is a mental note to myself because I keep forgetting which is which! And yes I saw and elephant shaped stalactite. I've seen more beautiful caves than this one, like for example Carlsbad Caverns which is really one of the most beautiful caves in the world. But Carlsbad didn't have a Buddhist statue in every nook and cranny! I learned from the tour guide that the here to the left people make offerings to the lion statue for fertility. People make offerings to the different spirits that inhabit places and animals.

Outside the cave the cicadas were deafening. Where was the forest mute button? The sky was clear but felt a mist while walking under a tree. Not a rain cloud in sight. Then I learned from a monk that actually I was just peed on by one of those noisy cicadas. Some nerve.

This reminded me that I needed to use the "bathroom". Really, squatting over a hole is easier on the back.

Finally we began our ride in the heat of the day, 2pm. We covered only 25 miles on either paved roads through farmland and rice paddies or dirt paths and one track mountain bike trails. We rode through a village that looked like it hadn't progressed on a 1000 years. Except some of the women sold me souvenirs that were definitely made in this century!

The scenery was beautiful but I think it was 100 degrees and humid out. The forests around us were burning from slash and burn agriculture and the sky was gray from the smog. When we finished the ride, I looked up at the sky and saw that it was raining ash. For the first time since I lived in NYC I felt asthmatic.

Perhaps it was for the best that I could only ride for one day.

Thailand day 2- Chaing Mai

2008-03-26T06:30:00.007+01:00

After stuffing myself silly with an extravagant hotel breakfast Jurij and I set out for a day on the town. I saw my first lizard half a block from the hotel, some sort of anole like creature. I was very excited. Its very hot and humid here and we need to consume a bottle of water for every block we walk or else we might pass out. The streets are bustling, lots of concrete and dirt. It reminds me vaguely of the Bowery or Canal st. in New York City where you can see piles of products stacked everywhere inside the open store fronts and that are bursting out into the street. I'm fascinated by the "telephone" poles along the street. Hanging from them are more than just the one telephone wire that we are used to in America or Europe. The wires hang like hair knotting and bunching around each pole. Again I feel like I'm in some distopic blade runner scenario.

Its strange to be in the minority as a white person. It makes me want to yell hey bro! Hey sis! every time I pass a white person on the street. There's this awkward dialog we say to each other with our eyes while we pass, "ya were tourists too and were white too but this doesn't mean we have to be friends, be friendly and start a conversation". Perhaps I'm just unfriendly

I'm still amazed by everyone wearing loose flip flops riding motorbikes. I'm surprised that there aren't lost flops littering the street.

Jurij and I walked the streets, saw a couple of Watts, or Buddhist temples. We had a bite to eat at a restaurant catering to an international crowd. On the menu next to the Pad Thai and curries was a club sandwich.

At on Watt you could talk to monks. They like to practice their English and answer questions about Buddhism. We talked to 2 young monks in their early 20's. The one said to me that one of their purposes is to spread the teachings of the Buddha to the common people. When I asked him what the major tenants of Buddhism were, he just smiled and said um. Then a gust of wind tore up our conversation and that was the end of that!

There was a garden by the Watt with sayings tacked to the trees, like Time and tide wait for no man and good to forgive, the best to forget. Sometimes I thought ya totally dude, other times I thought the saying were complete crap...like its good to forgive and best to forget!

We could here the monks chanting from the garden. I think I might have even like had something like a spiritual experience. Its very peaceful here.

In the evening we walked around the night bazaar. Carts with goods line the streets from 6 to 11pm. Its mostly tourist crap selling the same stuff, knock off purses, stupid tee shirts like the one that said "i pood" and a picture of someone on the toilet listening to music. But every once in awhile you would find a real artisan or artist selling there wares and that was something to look out for.
We went to sleep early in a city that never sleeps. The 7-11 on every corner is open 24 hours. Businesses are open 7 days a week and all night long. Not like Germany where everything closes at 8pm and on Sunday!

Jurij is still sick. I think he has the flu. And our room number is creepily 911.

Thailand- Chang Mai

2008-03-24T05:42:00.005+01:00

So hi everyone. Its been awhile. Today is the first full day of Jurij's and my 2 week vacation in Thailand. We got a nice direct 9 hour flight on LTU from Munich to Bangkok. We spent a couple hours at the lovely modern Bangkok airport before flying to Chaing Mai in northern Thailand. Its wonderful to see palm trees and feel the heat and humidity. Our hotel picked us up at the airport which was really nice. After such a long trip it was great not to have to think about directions. They drive on the "other" side here. The drivers seat is on the right. It feels very strange like we are going to crash into every oncoming vehicle. Remember Barbados Molly?! We are in the minority driving in a car. Most people ride motorbikes. An entire families, small children smooshed in between parents without helmets were the norm on the bikes. It gave me a heart attack just to watch them! Also on the road were many tuk tuks, basically a motorbike taxi with roof and two seats in the back. We passed many street markets, even the fruit is arranged differently. The place is so exotic I felt like I was driving through the set of the Blade runner or my crazy Asian dream last week. Its a bit unnerving when the atmosphere of your dream becomes reality! Except I think all the street advertising in my dream was in Chinese and here everthing is in the Thai script and in English thank god. Im realy glad English is my first language. It really makes it easier to get around the world.
The hotel we are staying at, D2, is the most amazing hotel Ive ever been to. Visually its beautiful, very modern, simple, elegant. stylish. It would fit in very nicely in Soho or in a spread of architectual digest. The room comes with all kinds of toiletries and various products I can take home. Like the nice umbrella with D2 written on it. I love all the goodies! The service is totally amazing. Its great to be pampered right now because Jurij is in bed with a fever and muscle aches. I think he got sick the moment we stepped into the Munich airport. The staff has been very helpful with bringing us extra blankets, bottled water and dinner to our room. They drove me to the pharmacy to get drugs for Jurij. They talked to bike tour people for us and helped us sadly cancel our 3 day bike tour. Did I mention they have this fantastic chic restuarant here witht he most amazing food. I had the best Thai food ever last night. Also breakfast is included with the stay. Breakfast was a real wowzer. It was a Thai/American/ German buffet. Eggs any style, banana pancakes, waffles, french toast made to order on the spot. Cheese, cereal, fresh fruit, delicious pastries, juice, smoothies and great coffee. I just wanted to sit there and eat the rest of the day. Did I mention how friendly the staff is? Everyone is smiling. When you greet someone you bow slightly. press your hands together and say Sawadee ka if your a woman and Sawadee krap if your a man. Its very nice. I like it. I havent stepped outside the hotel to experience Chaing Mai yet except for the car rides but already I feel like yes I could live here for a couple years. I think every 2 years one should move countries. Newness in someway is necessary for the soul. Hopefully Jurij will feel better soon so we can go out and explore. If not this hotel with its free internet, and its free happy hour with drinks and appetizers between 5 and 7 and the pool and spa on the second floor that I have yet to visit and the talkative English spreaking staff and guests will keep me contented for now. But soon I think I will have to get out and walk around.

Difference #11

2007-10-16T23:20:00.002+02:00

Today I went to the pharmacy and spent a lot of bar on various drugs.
The pharmacist gave me a bottle of champagne as a gift.
Ironically it is written on all the labels not to drink while taking any of these medications.
In Germany is alcohol is THE medication!

Difference #10

2007-07-12T15:25:00.002+02:00

Its mid July. Its the middle of the day and I'm wearing a sweater AND a jacket. I know this isn't "normal" weather for Augsburg but its really ridiculous. This temperature would NEVER happen in NY or PA at this time of year! Did I mention its been raining here for 3 weeks? grrrrr

Difference #9

2007-02-02T20:30:00.002+01:00

They dont have Groundhog's day.

Bucking a trend, Punxsutawney Phil doesn't see shadow - CNN.com

According to this CNN article Groundhog day stems from old German folklore.

"The Germans believed that if a hibernating animal cast a shadow February 2 -- the Christian holiday of Candlemas -- winter would last another six weeks. If no shadow was seen, legend said spring would come early."

no one that I have met so far in Germany has ever heard of this tradition...

I'm curious to know which region of "Germany" if it still is Germany!! that this came from...anyone?

Differences #8

2006-11-01T17:42:00.002+01:00

Art museums.

So I haven’t written in awhile… there were some complications…anyway we just got back from a trip to Vienna. Beautiful city. We went to Albertina, an art museum that had a Picasso exhibition. Believe it or not guys, there were school children between the ages of 10-13 on what appeared to be a school field trip at the exhibit. And everyone acted as it was completely normal to have young children in the presence of either naked or scantly clothed and badly drawn females. And I cant tell you how many times I read the word eroticism in a description below one of his paintings. I mean, I felt myself getting turned on. Just think of the children!!!! It’s an outrage! In America, if a teacher brought her under age class to an art museum, she would be fired from her job!

Museum Field Trip Deemed Too Revealing - New York Times

Differences #7

2006-10-03T18:32:00.002+02:00

Spinach.

I eat spinach with peace of mind

Differences #6

2006-10-01T09:14:00.002+02:00

Recycling.

Germans do not produce garbage. Well just a little bit but almost everything is recycled. Our kitchen garbage can is divided into 3 parts; a part for garbage, a part for plastic and metal and a part for compost. Paper waste is in another can. A young art student rummaging through our actual garbage would despair, a maxi, a condom, some floss and snot rags would be among the most exciting finds!

In NYC we also have recycling but plastic bags and yogurt cups and other food containers cannot be recycled. Among other things, you can’t recycle plastic or wax coated paper, hard cover books, plastic trays, plastic utensils, plastic toys, and plastic caps. That doesn’t leave much for me to recycle except for newspaper. Its futile anyway to recycle in NYC, I’ve followed the garbage men and watched them throw garbage plus clearly marked recycling into their trucks on several occasions.

What motivates Germans to be so conscientious about sorting out their metal, plastic, paper and compost from regular garbage? Well, I’ve found the answer. Germans pay for their garbage by weight. The more they recycle and the less garbage they have, the less its hurts the wallet. But I still haven’t figured out what motivates the tenants of my apartment building to compost since money isn’t the issue…could it actually be for the good of the environment?

Differences #5

2006-09-29T00:04:00.002+02:00

Floor names.

Here in Germany the first floor of a building is the second floor. What they call ground floor is what we call first floor. My name is Lisa and I live on the second floor. My apartment number is 208. About once a week I climb 2 flights of stairs, walk down the hall and get ready to insert my key into apartment 108 before realizing where I am and letting out a loud groan.

Differences #4

2006-09-27T12:52:00.003+02:00

Hall lights.

If I'm in my own apt. in NYC and I wake up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom or get a drink of water I either turn the hall light on stumble around in the dark. But if it’s the middle of the night and for some reason I'm at work, or in a hotel, apt. building or Time Square I expect all the lights to be on 24/7.

Here lights are only on at night in hallways if you turn on a timed light switch. If I’m coming come to my apartment at night I have to flip a light switch before going up the stairs. If I’m too slow the light will go out before I reach my floor and I pray that I wont break my legs stumbling up steps to find the next light switch in the pitch dark. I usually don’t make it down the hall to my door before the next light goes out. Every once in awhile I arrive at my door unscathed and find my next obstacle. To the left of my door is the square light switch and right below it a square door buzzer. I say eenie meenie minie moe, cross my fingers and hope I don’t press the buzzer and wake up Jurij.

Differences #4

2006-09-27T12:52:00.002+02:00

4. Hall lights

If I'm in my own apt. in NYC and I wake up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom or get a drink of water I either turn the hall light on stumble around in the dark. But if it’s the middle of the night and for some reason I'm at work, or in a hotel, apt. building or Time Square I expect all the lights to be on 24/7.

Here lights are only on at night in hallways if you turn on a timed light switch. If I’m coming come to my apartment at night I have to flip a light switch before going up the stairs. If I’m too slow the light will go out before I reach my floor and I pray that I wont break my legs stumbling up steps to find the next light switch in the pitch dark. I usually don’t make it down the hall to my door before the next light goes out. Every once in awhile I arrive at my door unscathed and find my next obstacle. To the left of my door is the square light switch and right below it a square door buzzer. I say eenie meenie minie moe, cross my fingers and hope I don’t press the buzzer and wake up Jurij.

Differences #3

2006-09-25T16:49:00.001+02:00

Screens.

No one has screens on their windows or doors.

Screens, those metal frames with wire mesh that pop in place in your window or exist as a second door do not exist. Since no one owns an air conditioner and everyone’s house needs some ventilation various entrances to ones dwelling are often left open particularly in the summer months.

Therefore flies thinking this open door policy is the key to the apartment unceremoniously buzz around the German’s meticulously clean and ordered Haus. I did find a screen alternative in the supermarket that seems to be somewhat popular. You can buy a screen curtain, cut it to size, and hang it up by tacking Velcro to your window and door frames. From personal experience this is only partially effective but better than nothing.

Differences #2

2006-09-22T10:30:00.001+02:00

Windows and doors.

I was at Jurij's parents house during my first visit to Germany. I attempted to open the door to the porch by pulling upward on the handle and the door nearly fell off. At least that’s what I thought as I was busy having a heart attack. Porch doors and windows have this amazing capability of opening from the top for maximum ventilation. And you need a lot of ventilation in apartments and houses over here since most dwellings are no older than 60 years and have been constructed with the latest energy saving technology. If you don’t crack open a window you just might suffocate since buildings are really air tight. Unfortunately after several months over here I still struggle to open the door the right way. After 32 years of opening a door only one way, the old door neurons in my brain aren't learning any new tricks.

US and Germany differences part 1

2006-09-20T12:46:00.001+02:00

It’s a funny. You visit another country and everything is weird, strange, backwards. You’re inspired, you take a lot of pictures and you write. Then you’re annoyed and complain. Why do they do it this way? Then after awhile it all becomes completely normal. You even find yourself in a dirndl. Finally you go home and everything is weird again.

Difference #1
ESCALATORS
I have enough trouble on escalators back home. I’ve fainted on an escalator from staring down at all the trippy lines, I’ve gotten my shoe stuck and I’ve attempted to go up the down escalator and down the up escalator on too many occasions.

Here in Germany they like to save energy. Imagine that! Escalators do not continuously run 24 hours a day like they do in the US. In fact they only run when someone is on the escalator. This is a very good idea from a conservation point of view but for me it is troublesome. I have to wait until I see some on riding on the up or down escalator before I can determine which is which...And in some places this can be a really long time.

fahrradunfall

2006-07-21T17:56:00.002+02:00

I've always laughed at the fact that Germans actually wait for a light to turn green before crossing a street despite there being not a car in sight. After numerous failed attempts to stay upright on my bike I see why. There are many roads intersecting at one crossing not just 4. Not only do you have to watch for cars but for buses and trams and an extremely high volume of bikers of all ages- I swear I saw a woman who was at least 100 zipping by, can she even walk?- rollerbladers, high speed wheel chairs, pedestrians and all kinds of wheeled contraptions people ride around in that I have no name for. Probably some really long German name that I cant pronounce, I dunno some kind of Verkehrsteilnehmer(in) (road user).

Speaking of German words here is Lisa's German lesson 101.
Fahrer-driver
Fahrrad-bicycle
Fahrerei-driving about, long hours of driving
Fahrt- journey
fahrtüchtig-person who is fit to drive
fahruntüchtig-person who is unfit to drive
Fahrvergnügen (fahrfignugen in the USA)- driving pleasure (compound word "made up" by VW, not found in any dictionary here nor in the conciousnessesesessses of my German friends who look at me strangely while we are taking a Fahrt in a Farrari* and I say Fahrvergnügen!!!!

*this is an Italian car. Farrari is the dudes last name. (Ya ok Im dumb, I dont know anything about cars!) I just looked this up on Wikipedia because it seemed so similar to Fahrerei, which would be the perfect name for a car anyway!

I got farrari's on my mind because not too long ago Jurij and I were rollerblading out in the middle of peaceful German countryside and we saw one. We were stopped on the side of the road admiring a quaint church and a magnolia tree when this black flattened car from the future appeared behind us and drove very slowly around us. My jaw dropped as it went by. It was quite out of place! (I cant figure out what model it was..Ive spent 45 min of my life looking)

***correction: Jurij just said it was a Lamborghini. Even cooler! No wonder I couldnt find it on the fararari's website!

Anyway thats all. Tomorrow were going on a canoe trip in the south of France. See ya!

Actually Im not sure how I will canoe because I ripped the pads off the fingers of my right hand when I fell off my bike. This was my only injury but even though it is quite small it is on a very important part of my body. Jurij thankfully (or unthankfully) put me through an hour and a half of excrutiating pain cleaning my wounds last night. While he was hunched over my hand after 12 hours of working, I ate all the cherrys he brought home. He was really mad. He said I did it in revenge. YEP!! (I bought him a kilo of cherries today to make up for it)

Today I bought a pair of sports gloves to hide my wounds. Im going to look like whatshis face in Moonstruck....

Zidane...why???

2006-07-11T14:02:00.001+02:00

This isn’t getting much press in the NYTimes but is anyone as obsessed as me with what happened to Zinedine Zidane at the World Cup?

After a beautiful day of bike riding though old forests, picking strawberries and swimming in a lake with friends a bunch of us sat in a beer garden eating sausages, drinking Radlers (beer and lemonade…sound gross? I think so. I’d rather drink a PURE beer…just like my men!) and watching the game on a big projected screen. I was all for France winning the World Cup. I like Zidane. He’s soo cute! And has an awesome name. But I was really mad at him for reacting to Materazzi’s insult, head butting him in the chest and therefore getting evicted from the game, the last game before he retires. What up Zizou? If you had played the final minutes of the game France probably would have won. They were the better team.

I’ve been obsessed with reading about the head butt on the internet(BBC sports) since it happened…as well as the Tour de France doping scandal. Oy vey don’t get me started.
It’s just as good a read as US weekly or People magazine! I’m starting to understand sports…

On another but similar note it seems that not only have Germans taken a liking to flag waving but that they will wave ANY flag! After the game ended, cars were honking, people were shouting and Italian flags were waving. For a moment, I thought to myself boy there are a lot of Italians here in Germany!

World Cup

2006-07-02T15:30:00.001+02:00

WORLD CUP PICTS:
http://homepage.mac.com/lisagoldfarb/album/PhotoAlbum128.html

So the big news here is that Germany beat Argentina the other night in the semi finals. I’ve never been a sports fan. Perhaps because I never understood what I was watching, I always thought it was a pointless waste of time. Solely because of the interests of the men in my life, I’ve watched mostly baseball, basketball and football. By this statement I am obviously American. Why is it that the entire world has a love affair with soccer but in the U.S. it is not quite so popular?

I’ve never watched a soccer match until a couple weeks ago when I arrived in Germany at the advent of the World Cup. I’ve been completely hooked since Germany played Poland in the group play. Soccer is easy to watch. 1. I can follow the ball. 2. There are a lot of fine young men in shorts. Girls, why watch a sport whose male players are buried under so much equipment (like U.S. football) you can’t even see them?

Germany is hosting the 2006 World Cup. The logo is “A time to make friends”. 2006 is no longer a time to gas Jews and conquer the world. I think that’s what they’re trying to say.

Last week Jurij and I biked into town to our favorite bar Julep’s for the Germany-Poland soccer match. The place was packed for the game. Soccer was projected onto large screens and TVs through out the NYC themed restaurant and its large Bavarian beer garden. We found a seat inside with a fairly good view when the German soccer players were singing the national anthem.

Jurij said to me that the soccer players were just recently taught the words as nationalist songs were not taught in school. Three women sat at a nearby table painting flags on each other’s faces but first we overheard them asking what the order of the black, red, and gold stripes were. Then the giant world cup hamburger that I ordered arrived with a German party flag on it, only the colors were upside down making it look closer to a Belgian flag. These were signs of Germany’s discomfort with patriotism and I was comfortable with that.

The big story here (by now its an old story) is flag waving. 6 months ago or even 3 months ago it was an activity looked down upon and associated with nationalist right wingers. By the time the German team won the match Augsburg erupted into a sea of black, red, and gold. Biking home was disconcerting. The streets were crowded. People wrapped in flags were shouting and waving flags. Cars with flags on the sides of their windows were honking their horns. In my mind I was biking as fast as I could away from the Nazi’s. Jurij was uncomfortable with this exaggerated display of patriotism. He said its ok for young kids to wave the flag, but it really makes you think when those over 65 are waving the flag!

The next day we watched USA vs. Italy. The Italians were expected to win but instead the game ended in a tie. USA played aggressively and 3 of their players were eliminated because of fouls. This has only happened a few other times in world cup history. Jurij said it was a strange match. At the end of a game I heard a nearby American voice saying. They tied? What’s next? That’s it? Ah yes another clueless American besides me watching an unfamiliar sport. Who ties in American sports? There is always a winner.

After a couple weeks of unabashed German patriotism, I think I’ve come to terms with it (to some degree anyway).
It’s in the spirit of the games. After all every other country is waving their flags. In my German language class all the students were decked out in their countries colors and team jerseys. Although it still makes him uneasy I can tell by the flags painted on his face by the nurses on his ward that Jurij has come to terms with it too (to some degree!).

Last night at Julep’s (and I’m glad I’m literate or I would have thought it was Jew lips) I routed along with Jurij and the crowd for Germany. I kinda felt weird about it but what the hell I’m here and the U.S. team is out. Anyway I felt better about that when during half time I went around the corner to synagogue!

I became friendly with Gili, a Russian Jewish guy in his 60’s or so, in my German language class. He told me to meet him there at 6. Services were at 7 but he wanted me to meet some people. When I arrived I got a nice private tour of the building and then Gili ushered me into a room where many members sat watching the TV. Well, he said in his broken Germlish, today is not a good day to meet people. I looked around me and saw many yamalka-ed heads all engrossed in the game. They cheered when Germany scored. Why not, they are German. The children and teens waved German flags (in the temple!). You’ve come a long way baby!

last day in NYC

2006-06-15T11:44:00.001+02:00

On 6/14/06, Molly Reisner wrote:

hey lees,

how was your trip back? minus the forgotten passport, of course. mommom called me in a panic, but by the time i called back the driver was en route back to the airport with your passport. you must have been freaking out!!

love,
molly

OMGD, Momom called you? I’m so embarrassed.
My day started like this:

9AM. I had breakfast with Bill, and then we went to his apt and discussed the progress on his latest painting. Half-hour later we left and went our separate ways. He went to the market and I walked 10 blocks to Citibank. Upon arrival I unzipped my book bag and discovered that my purse containing my wallet housing my Citibank card was missing. I left my purse at Bill's! I lost over an hour looking for Bill in Dagistino's, rummaging for a stray quarter and calling him on a pay phone that took me some time to locate. Luckily I reached him and he was home.

11:30AM. Last chance to pick up my slides at Duggal. I had 2 weeks in NY to do so but of course I forgot. Luckily Duggal called Momom's house while I was in Allentown and a purple note pasted on my bedroom door was waiting for me when I got home Sunday night. Thanks for the reminder Duggal! The F-train arrived fast for once and dropped me off at 23 st. The glowing blue and white neon of a Citibank greeted me as I emerged from the subway. What luck! I FORGOT Citibank was right there. Now where was Duggal? I forgot to take the note with me, but I was sure I remembered 23 29th st. I walked 6 blocks and 3 avenues. There is no 23 29th street. I call 411. Can you tell me the address of Duggal? Sure it’s on 23rd street. Is it 29 23rd street?? Yes. Click. Shitcrap!!
IF (and that’s a big if) I were smart I would have only had to walk one block from the train/Citibank. Another hour lost.

2PM. When I got home, Jurij called. While I was talking to him I realized I didn’t know where my passport was. I was freaking out on the phone and tearing my room apart at the same time.
After we hung up I located it. It was in my computer bag. I called Jurij back and reassured him that I would be in Germany tomorrow.

4:45PM. 15 minutes before the baker (the driver) was supposed to have come; I discovered that my computer fit snuggly in my backpack. Remembering the pain in my back caused by my carry-on: a backpack and very heavy computer case, I decided to empty the miscellaneous contents of my computer bag into my soon to be checked in suitcase and put my computer in my pack. Then I took my computer case and stashed it in the basement.

5:10PM. I call the baker. Where are you? You were supposed to be here at 5PM! Oh I forgot. Good you called. I’m coming now.

5:15PM. The baker picked me up, drove me a half-hour to JFK and dropped me off.

5:45PM. 15 feet into the airport I was asked for my passport. It was only then did I realize that something very very important, something critical for my advancement 181 inches into the airport was missing. I reached for my new quad band, T mobile, I-work-in-all-countries-cell phone…but unfortunately I-do-not-work-when-I-am-not-charged-cell phone. With a pitiful, lost look on my face I was able to borrow a cell phone from the sweet God fearing guard at 15 feet. I called the baker. I called Momom. For the next hour I am paralyzed with fear and have to pee really badly but cannot leave my suitcases.

7PM. I had my passport minus 70 dollars for 2 trips to the airport and a major adrenaline rush. 5 minutes later I lost another $50 for 2 overweight suitcases. Ironically, before I emptied the contents of my computer bag into my suitcases I placed them on a scale and they were not overweight! Was this the price to pay for not having a backache?

7:45PM. I make a mad dash to the plane. Luckily for my future seat mates, I have 5 minutes to spare before boarding and I rush of to empty my about to overflow bladder.

8PM. Plane takes off. I got to sleep.

4AM EST. (10AM). I wake up with a backache in Munich.

more lizard musings

2006-05-26T08:03:00.001+02:00

Is anyone besides my immediate family actually still reading my blog about lizards?

Two days this week we were out at the Beach ranch radio tracking horned lizards and searching for more horned subjects. Moose needs to track 20 Texas horned lizards for this field season. So far 3 adult horned lizards are wandering the property with tracking devices glued to their backs.

It’s unusually hot in Lubbock for this time a year. It’s been over 100 degrees and every time I bend over to pick up a rock I get dizzy. I’m sure if you’ve seen all my brothers pictures on Flickr, you might assume that Texas wildlife is not only diverse but crawlin’ all over the place.

You might think that a walk with Lisa and Jack through the Texas scrublands might lead to a venomous bite on the ankle. But really if you’re not looking really hard you could easily see nothing but some grass and some birds. Texas wildlife IS diverse but it is not abundant and most animals are hiding in their underground tunnels waiting for either the apocalypse or just the hot sun to go down. After I take a bite of this mushroom I think I’ll slide down that rabbit hole and join them.

The chances of getting bit by a snake are slim. They really don’t want to waste their venom on someone who is much too large to swallow. If his rattling doesn’t scare you off he’s going to try to leave the scene as quickly as possible because you IS scary as shit! In fact he might not even rattle so much at all since all his louder rattling amigos were rounded up by killer cowboys. They were never heard from again. This left the quieter rattlesnakes to live long and multiply providing science text books with an example of (un) natural selection.

While I was aimlessly walking around the brush scanning for lizards, I wondered what neurons were firing at the moment I realized out of the corner of my eye that an animal such as a Texas horned lizard was sunning himself nearby. How did I make sense of that breathing patch of lizard fabric so meticulously sown into the scrubby carpet of the Beach Ranch? I would scan the ground with full concentration and determination. It was tiring. I saw a lot of “stuff” but couldn’t catch shit.

Moose scans effortlessly, a skill highly developed over 20 years of training. In his words,

“ The animals just pop out, seeing them just comes second nature.”

For both of us, the eureka moment of noticing (and then catching if you can) the hidden animal is magical and exhilarating even if it’s the same species over and over again. But one never knows what waits around the bend. A couple days ago I spied two coach whip snakes entwined in cold-blooded copulation next to a prickly pear cactus. Catching two reptiles in the act was very exciting. It’s a fetish of mine…just kidding. But it sure is much easier to see animal if it is moving (and having sex) than if it is still!

While we were “road cruising”, (its also much easier to see an animal if its on the open road) Moose slammed on the breaks and I went flying forward for the 10th time the other day. I looked ahead. Nothing was in sight for miles. He jumped out of the car. In seconds he returned and the familiar Eau de’ Colubrid wafted into my nostrils. The million dollar lottery look of total and utter joy on his face told me that this wasn’t just another western diamondback rattlesnake but someone much more precious. It was the beautiful and fair Texas long nosed snake-a snake he had previously only seen in pictures; a reptile to write songs about.

Camp Bowie

2006-05-22T05:02:00.002+02:00

Howdy y'all. Spent Tuesday-Fri at an isolated army base with my brother. The only people we saw were the soldiers that initially checked us in and the various waitresses who served us food when we left the base to fix ourselves some dinner. We were tv-less, phone-less and internet-less for 4 days but it didnt matter none. We had each others, the coyotes, jack rabbits, bob cats, rattlesnakes and collared lizards all to ourselves, and thats all that mattered.

Our mission at Camp Bowie, Brownwood, smack in the dead center of Texas, was to find ourselves a Texas horned lizard. But let me tell you, those Texas horned lizards were about as ubiquitous as a regular high fat yogurt in a Texan supermarket. In other words, we didnt find one stinkin' horned lizard on the property.

Moose is doing horned lizard surveys on 4 army bases for the Texas National Guard and for his PhD project. Unfortunately not much research has been done for the lizard which is now a Texas state threatened animal so there is not much baseline data. During the 60s and 70s the horned lizard was abundant in almost every county of Texas but has been in decline for reasons unknown since the 80s. It is now locally extinct in most of eastern Texas. In 1996 they still abundant at Camp Bowie but surveys taken in 2000 and 2004 yielded 0 and 2 juveniles respectively. So far none have been found there this year. Perhaps the lizards are occuring at such a low density that we cant find them.

Research can only be done at the base when it is empty of soldiers training and practicing target shooting for obvious reasons. Unlike soldiers who are prepared to die for their country, we are not prepared to die for our horned lizards. We slept in the empty barracks. The simple, spartan buildings were made of unpainted cinderblocks and alternately reminded me of a jail and a lego set. Luckily we didnt spend much time there. Morning, noon and night you could either find us (if you had some kind of GPS locator on us) half lost on some unmarked back road of the base's 10,000 acre property or eating a meal that would inevitably give me a stomach ache or make my brothers face puff up at some backwards restaurant in Brownwood Texas. Those deep fried pickle chips were damn good in our mouths...damn it!

In the few hours we had contact with civilization we had to make a concerted effort to leave the hillbilly/ jive/slapstick theatre we created....Just hang loose blood. Shes gonna catch you up on the rebound on the medside. What it is big mamma? My mamma dont raise no dummies, I dug her rap. Cut me some slack jack. Chump dont want the help chump dont get the help....
You have to see "Airplane" to appreciate this quote which I probably mangled, but this was our conversation over and over again all day of which we never tired of speaking. Moose can recite it and a million other quotes frightningly well. I cant remember shit and should never attempt to act.

I havent lived with my brother since we were teenager and I dont think I ever spent this much time with him in my life. I think we're pretty compatible and Im really enjoying myself here with him. Its amazing how playing a charater from "Good Times" can diffuse any potential tensions (as long as its the privacy of our own home or car!)

Canyons, Caverns and beautiful Guadalupe

2006-05-16T02:26:00.001+02:00

Saturday we drove to the Caprock Canyons and went hiking for the day. Western diamondback rattlesnake, greatplains rat snake and coachwhip snakey crossed our path. I have a great video of my bro catching the coachwhip.

Sunday we made my dad's childhood dream a reality by visiting the Carlsbad Caverns 3 hours west in NM. Since my grandmother saves everything we discovered my dad's 4th grade scrapbook of caverns a few years ago. The 50 year old National Geographic photos are still accurate. I recognized several stalagtites and stalagmites. They haven't changed one bit!

In the evening we hiked in the Guadalupe mountains. A little while ago there was an inland sea here with a large coral reef. We hiked around the "sea bottom" and looked up to the layers of compressed coral reef on the tops of the mountains. Rocks are like, old. Its difficult to comprehend that like a lot of time passed before I was alive. How did it get to be now already?

link to my pics
http://homepage.mac.com/lisagoldfarb/album/PhotoAlbum119.html
http://homepage.mac.com/lisagoldfarb/album/PhotoAlbum120.html
check out awesome video of my bro catching a snake:
http://homepage.mac.com/lisagoldfarb/album/iMovieTheater121.html

The Beach Ranch

2006-05-16T01:55:00.001+02:00

My brother is a relentless searcher of herps (to herp, v. to search for reptiles/ amphibians, herps, n. reptiles/amph.). Discovering the lizard in the haystack, stalking it like prey and then lovingly talking to it to it when its in his hands never ceases to excite him day in and day out. He would make a really great hunter-gatherer…now my mind is wandering... In my atavistic Flintstones fantasy I’m decorating the cave with buffalo, my father (a psychiatrist) is shrinking heads and my mom is cooking a buffalo over the open fire…perhaps we are living in Crystal cave. (Cave in PA)

My parents flew out for a visit this weekend. Friday Moose took us to one of his hunting grounds, the Beach ranch. The Beaches have 8,000 acres of land they want used for conservation purposes. 98% of Texan land is privately owned, so my brother is happy to have permission to use the property. Accidentally wandering on someone else’s property here in Texas can get you shot. Some years back a grad student who had permission to use a private property got shot in the leg when the rancher mistook him for a trespasser. “Don’t mess with Texas,” an environmental sign used to express itself to would be litterers, has multiple meanings.

The beach ranch is located 50 miles south east of Lubbock (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lubbock,_Texas) on the Caprock escarpment. There is no comparing the rolling landscape of the Caprock escarpment and the even more spectacular nearby Caprock Canyons (http://www.tpwd.state.tx.us/spdest/findadest/parks/caprock_canyons/) to Lubbock, which is on a plateau. I look out the window as we drive there and think, they don’t call this big sky country for nothing, there is not a mountain or a molehill in sight. There is an occasional dust devil, bail of hay, cow, random house and oil pump field. Playing I spy wouldn’t be much of a challenge here. I closed my eyes and thought it was raining, but soon realized it was only the sound of millions of bugs exploding on our windshield. This is the flatlands where 2 D people with “Jesus is the only” way written on their tee shirts drive in oversized staypuff trucks 10 miles below the speed limit into the sunset. In the car we listen an audiotape titled “The World is Flat” by Thomas Freidman. It sure looks flat from this vantage point. From here I can see into the offices of Beijing where the Chinese are beating us in the global technology race.

Driving off the plateau the landscape changes dramatically. Somehow in any context whether it be mood swings, the stock market or your EKG, peaks and valleys are always more interesting than simply flat. Once on the dirt roads of the ranch I have a new appreciation for oversized trucks with 4-wheel drive. Luckily I am in one although as I accidentally drench my shirt in an attempt to hydrate myself, it is not a smooth ride.

Its 95 degrees outside and even though everyone keeps telling me it’s a dry heat I fail to see the significance. I am melting, especially since I’m wearing a sweatshirt with a hood up so I wont get further sunburned. My mom agrees and we spend a lot of time between the shade of a tall mesquite bush and the air conditioned truck while my brother and my dad romp around the scrublands searching “for stuff”. They bring back collared lizards, racerunners, a baby ornate turtle, a ground snake and some pretty rocks to our nest, but unfortunately no horned lizards for a photo shoot. Moose and Dad’s latest digital SLR’s capture the creatures for all eternity (or until this latest technology becomes archaic). Ironically, the one family member with an MFA in photography (me) has only a point and shoot digital camera. So far I’ve taken a lot of blurry “expressionistic” photos of lizards. I think I can better capture their personality, the essence if you will of a Phrynosoma cornutum or Cnemidophorus sexlineatus viridis with just the right amount of camera shake.

Keep checking www.JackGoldfarb.com for great photos of Texan wildlife and landscapes.
Also here is the links to my pics http://homepage.mac.com/lisagoldfarb/album/PhotoAlbum119.html
http://homepage.mac.com/lisagoldfarb/album/PhotoAlbum120.html

Why I am here

2006-05-10T19:15:00.001+02:00

Last night I dreamed that there were crickets breeding and multiplying in my bedroom. In a panic I began stomping on the hordes of insects as they were crawling up my legs. I woke up in a sweat, opened my eyes, took a deep breath and breathed in the unpleasant woodsy aroma of crickets. Yes, they really are breeding and multiplying in my "bedroom". I wouldn't be surprised if one of the stray crickets I see roaming around the apartment crawled up my legs last night. I'm sleeping on my brother Moose's couch here in Lubbock Texas. There is a large tupperware container under his "dining room table" containing living, multiplying bite sized bearded dragon meals 6 feet from where I sleep. On top of the table are 2 aquariums home to a desert king snake and a bull snake my brother found in "the field".
In this large 2 bedroom apartment my brother rents for 400 smackers (can you believe it?) one bedroom door is always (thankfully) closed. What is behind door number 2? Only 14 adult breeding bearded dragons, 22 newly hatched babies, a tub full of crickets and a really really bad smell. In Moose's bedroom are 2 incubators housing a total of 75 bearded dragon eggs, some which are hatching. In one, a tiny head with large closed eyes is emerging from its white leathery pouch. Its super sweet. You can check out hatching pictures and totally awesome wildlife pictures at www.jackgoldfarb.com.
I must add---although this is a very "familial" living situation coming from my Germanic, orderly bf, Jurij's apartment, its a bit of a shock! I myself like to keep my hypothetical apartment in a state somewhere (and Ill be very nebulous about where) between the two!
Anyway, Bearded dragons are desert lizards native to Australia. They are usually pale in color and grow no bigger than 2 feet. They have cute triangular heads, a sweet disposition and a flat body evolved perfectly for fitting into rock crevaces to escape their enemies. Because the light skin below their heads turns brown when they are upset or interested in the opposite sex they are aptly named, BD. Popular as pets and easy to breed, my brother makes some easy dough selling the lizards to pet stores.
Most of you know that the Goldfarbs are a reptile (and amphibian) family. We would have been an all other creatures gracing the earth as well family if it weren't for all the stuffy noses, watery eyes and shortness of breath, ect. suffered from close encounters of the furry kind.
Reptiles and amphibians have been walking the Goldfarb house since the beginning of my brothers time. Before him we had birds (which are reptiles).
Moose's unusual interest began as soon as he could walk and stuff small creatures into his pockets. His childhood was spent from sun up to sun down at the ponds catching frogs, salamanders, turtles and fish. Always extremely focused, by the time he was 8 he was already an expert herpetologist. (Herpetology is the study of reptiles and amphibians excluding birds and is a test question).
20 years later, he is at Texas Tech in Lubbock, Texas catching Texas horned lizards for his PhD project. Not much has changed since then except his interest in girls. His thesis is on the geographic variation of Texas HL. Basically he is studying the differences in morphology, habitat selection and home range size between several Texas horned lizard populations. This is important for conservation and management. The THL is a Texas state threatened animal.
And I'm here to help!!!! Yay! I'm here in Texas because I wanted to chill out with my brother and he needs an extra assistant to help him catch lizards. Perfect!
Yesterday we drove out to the Beach Ranch, an 8,000 acre property owned by guess who, the Beaches! 5 hours of searching produced 3 THLs., one of which I found and am very proud. We also saw a couple spade foot toads, barn and burrowing owls, a bob white quail, extremely cute prairie dogs, and a Kansas glossy snake to name a few. If I was there by myself I would have said that I saw some birds, some frogs a snake and a 2 Texas horned lizards. At least I know what they (THLs) look like!

Texas..where am I??

2006-05-09T18:50:00.001+02:00

So Ive been in Germany for 3 months but after less than 24 hours in Texas I feel compelled to start a blog! It was a long ride-Munich-Chicago-Dallas-Lubbock. And of course I was seated in the netherregions of each plane and with each change had to run with my heavy bags to the farthest gate in each airport. I knew I was in a foriegn country when I landed in Chicago. I was running for my next flight but I was really more motivated to escape from the sickening odors of the various fast food joints and hordes of massively obese people I was passing. I never saw so many fat people in one place than in the airports of Chicago and Dallas. I mean every 4th person looked like a BLOATED Stay Puff M.Man. Every other person looked like they were in the various stages of Stay Puff Metamorphosis. Pop pop pop...pop pop pop. I was hoping to at least see some beautiful butterflies emerge, but I think its really an alien take over.

Moose picked me up at the airport and then we went to the supermarket. I wanted to get some yogurts for breakfast but in this giant supermarket with 50 choices of each product, there was a limited supply of yogurts in the dairy section and all were FAT FREE!!! Not one regular yogurt to be found nor one thin Texan in the market.

But I must say the people here are really friendly...perhaps TOO friendly. I did enjoy my conversations with the talkative crowds on my domestic flights. I even enjoyed my 4 hour religious debate with my born again Christian seat mate even though when I asked him if he felt sorry for me because I was Jewish and didnt except Christ, he said yes. He said he felt sorry because my life could be so much better....but he didnt judge me (even though Im going to hell)

I didnt enjoy the friendly bagger. First to contrast, in Germany they dont have baggers, they dont even have bags! And the bookbag I would bring was not allowed in the store. All the fattening foods Germans buy and eat in the store are burned off in the check out. First you run an obstacle course to the front of the store to pick up your bag, then you try to pay for your food while you are feverishly stuffing canned kraut and a large ham over soft fruit and camembert into your small bookbag because the next customers food is barrelling down the conveybelt and is mixing up with yours. Questions are spoken to you in German and in a moment of panic you cant even remember English.
In Texas they have baggers. They give you a choice of paper or plastic bags. And then, THEY COMMENT ON YOUR PRODUCT CHOICE. "Hey do you use that Colgate hydrogen peroxide because you have sores in your mouth or for another reason. Do you use it as a regular mouthwash?". Shocked, I just stared quietly at her...but telepathically, I said to her, listen fugly bitch, Im going to commit murder by breathing on you right now". She said, "I dont mean to get personal but Im going to school for dentistry".
Then she procedes to walk with us to our car pushing our wagon and then loading up our car (parked in a sea of oversized monster vehicles) while making chit chat.